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Red Sox
Published: October 13, 2004
Comments: 2
By Jason Chapman
Quote from my girlfriend last night during the first inning of Boston's 10-7 loss to the Yankees.
Jason: "God, I hope the Red Sox win."
Julie: "So do I or else you're gonna be a real bitch."
Hilarious.
Kinda says it all doesn't it?
It says that she loves me enough to cheer energetically for the Sox, but with entirely different motivations.
It says that she fears my mood swings after a sporting event that has no true relevance to her life.
It says that I love the Red Sox enough for my mother to give me this advice: "Jason, please warn Julie about the Red Sox. Just warn her. I don't want her to experience you after a Red Sox loss without at least some forewarning."
What am I, the Hurricane Early Detection Center?
I've always wanted the Yankees in this very situation. Because, in my view, if we win the World Series, it has to go through New York. It's mandatory. But, I could be a glutton for my own punishment, because after last night's debacle, I'm worried that the Sox are gonna get demolished.
And then all offseason, I'm going to repeat to myself in whatever mental asylum Julie decides to check me into, "Why, oh why, didn't I wish for the Twins?"
Sorry, Julie. It's almost over. Either way. Win or lose. And, forget my mother, I'd never be any worse than a tropical depression.
(No one tell her about football season.)
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